Category Archives: Reviews

I like to read, watch films and I like to listen to music too when the mood take me. In these posts I will share with you what I have been listening to, watching and reading lately. Enjoy and by all means feel free to tell me your own opinions and my lack of good taste!

Robo Basho – My Article in Irregular Magazine 13

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Last summer I wrote a short article for Irregular Magazine for their thirteenth issue.  I was happy to be asked by a customer of 15mm.co.uk who is also on the staff of the magazine as they were looking for professional writers to create material for a ‘Mysteries of the East’ focused set of content.  My love of all things Japanese combined with giant robots (more on this next month…it will be worth the wait) gave me an idea for a piece all about a sport that replaced war in a ravaged future Japan.  Wrestling in the form of two hundred foot tall, two thousand ton machines, which shake a stadium and make a crowd of tens of thousands roar in approval.  Robo Basho 2115!

You can view and download the issue on Irregular Magazine website.

The article is part one of two with the first part focusing on the history and background of Japan in 2115 which then leads to the sport of Robo Basho and the customs of the giant machines themselves the ‘Roborikishi’ in their stables.  An account of that occurs inside the ring and the weapons allowed along with the Gyoiji or Referee too.  The Kuroboshi III type giant mecha is looked over and its super thick armour and massive muscle servo bunches compared to western war machines of similar size.  Ending with the roleplaying possibilities for Robo Basho the article explains what would be featured in part two.  A good read if I say so myself!

Irregular Magazine 13 was due out last summer and the delay is regrettable.  Here is a statement from the editor on this from their website:

First of all, we’d like to start with an apology to all of our readers and contributors. We were not able to publish Irregular Magazine in Summer 2012, which we deeply regret. We believe we’ve got through the problems that made this impossible and are now back on track with regular publications!

I do not want to get into this here but I think that the problems Irregular had are similar to those other online wargame magazines and indeed other printed monthly titles have had too.  Finding and obtaining content that interests an ever diverging readership is tough and adding to that the sheer speed of the online community and news feeds means that traditional formats are failing.  No point in putting news in a magazine these days.  Focusing on deep article content is the way forward, a more journal like approach.  This of course is hard to come by from writers and artists as it takes longer to create.  For those interested it took me eight hours to pen the article plus an hours proof reading.

Lastly I must give praise to Sam Croes my good friend who created the superb Robo Basho artwork for the article which also features as the cover of the magazine too.  His talent always makes me smile and he was very kind in agreeing to craft this piece of art in his limited free time for me.  He has also produced a blog post on how he created the superb image for Sumo Basho, check it out.

GBS

Bitter Seeds by Ian Tregillis – Review

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A few quiet days for me online it seems, not due to me you understand but more my good lady’s visit to a high quality Spa leaving me with our three little tikes and the school run.  So I am here, not so much, but just as busy (I admire my wife, multi-tasking is a learned skill!) and you will have to to forgive me if my next few posts are shorter than normal.  I have to fit them around the routine of the house!  Right, with that out of the way where are we…a review of the novel Bitter Seeds by Ian Tregillis.

Above is an image of the book I have (in the middle), given to me by my dear friend Jim Brittain for Christmas but why show different covers.  The reason is one of them main factors for me in reviewing this book.  Put simply its terrible.  The middle cover does not tell the story at all, the one on the right is  a bit better but still not good and oddly the one on the left is the most accurate is somewhat uninspired.  Jim Brittain recommend I read Bitter Seeds and I was dubious at first as I am not really a world war two or fantasy fan but I tried and over the course of two days I was glad that I did.  While the cover fails to tell a tale the author is done a way, way better job of it.

Bitter Seeds as it turns out is part of a trilogy and I had no idea this was the case since I make a point of NOT reading online reviews or about the author allowing the book to stand instead on its own merit.  Here is a little tit bit of the plot:

The year is 1939. Raybould Marsh and other members of British Intelligence have gathered to watch a damaged reel of film in a darkened room.

It appears to show German troops walking through walls, bursting into flames and hurling tanks into the air from afar.

If the British are to believe their eyes, a twisted Nazi scientist has been endowing German troops with unnatural, unstoppable powers.

And Raybould will be forced to resort to dark methods to hold the impending invasion at bay.

But dealing with the occult exacts a price. And that price must be paid in blood.

The novel moves at the cracking pace and the settings of London, Berlin, England, France, Germany in the lead up to and during World War Two is excellently done.  Characters are superbly drawn and believable and the central idea of the book is original.  I do not want to spoil it but it mixes history with magic, the occult and super science too to give a brew that is potent and hold the interest very well.   There are tense moments and the action scenes are a delight to read.

Towards the end I realised that the book must be part of a series as there were several strands of the plot that went nowhere…but I assume that they will be revealed in the sequel(s).  My favourite character was Gretel, now that is a super power not to be taken lightly!  Warlocks and tapped Willpower are well matched…tough to say more without spoilers creeping in..so I won’t.  I will leave it at that.

I recommend reading this book if you are looking for something beyond the norm in science fantasy.  I might well get the next one this summer.

GBS

Biodome or Biodumb? Film Review

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biodome

My good friend Jim Brittain commented at the foot of my recent review of the ‘film’ Battleship (2012) about a flick he thought even worse.  A movie named Biodome starring Pauly Shore and Stephen Baldwin from 1996.  Well I am up for a challenge and it makes a fine break from work to watch terrible films so once my copy arrived by digital file I set about watching Biodome.  I did this before reading any of the online reviews so that I would have my own opinion.

The online reviews range from bad to really bad to apocalyptic atrocious.  So no bonuses there, turns out it really is universally loathed by the film community.  But what did I think?

I would say first off that this is a ‘buddy’ or a ‘stoner’ film and that should count for something such as I am sure that teens of the time and those of a more challenged intellectual view now would enjoy this movie.  Its a slapstick, its cruel and its slow too; made for those who are in the mood for such things.  I was a teen when this film came out but I did not see it then.  The plot is fairly simple, two losers (Shore and Baldwin) are dumped by their airhead enviro-saving girlfriends which forces to them to go to the site of the Biodome project.  Biodome is a sealed environment which will see four scientists spend a year inside it living with nature.  This sort of stuff was big in the 1990’s.  Of course those meant to go inside do not and the two losers do instead.  Hilarity ensues yes? ….well…no.

The journey to the Biodome is a mini road trip that just makes you loath the two main characters.  Especially Pauly Shore as he is either a poorer actor than Baldwin in that he cannot act ‘stupid enough’ or his character is just a manipulative weasel who effectively goads and tortures his friend while the two of them do nothing but spout crap constantly.    Once they are trapped in the Biodome with the four true scientists for the year long experiment (including Kylie Minogue in one of her ‘wilderness years’ roles, she also dated Shore for a while) one of the scientists describes the two loses as ‘Generation X Road Kill on the Superhighway of Tomorrow’ and that sort of sums them up.   Being stuck in the Biodomee sees the two losers torture each other and the scientists and also try a bit of ‘sexual assault’ for fun.  They hear nothing, they remember nothing, they respect nothing and no one; they are cretins.  None of the gags they carry out in the dome are funny, they are just cruel and pointless.  An example being the insect room where very endangered species are being bred to increase their numbers…upon hearing this the two losers trash the room and effectively kill those species.  They then set up a giant sheet of fly paper and actually kill every insect and bird in the dome.

Scroll on a bit and the losers escape the dome and then invite all their idiotic friends into it for a giant party.  The dome is wreaked and the financier of the dome blames the scientists while the two losers watch and giggle!  But of course they then change their minds and gaining not only fifty points on their IQ’s but also ten years knowledge in various disciplines they then lock themselves in the dome and repair it!  Total guff.  They then save it from the lead scientist who has gone mad.  More guff.  The film ends with them having learned nothing at all and driving with their girlfriends into what looks like a nuclear power plant.  I can only assume they then blow up the world.

Rose McGowan is in this film but sadly (or lucky for her) the editing of her scene cuts out her lines so she has no speaking part despite opening her mouth a couple of times!

Summing up the acting the film.  Its poor but not terrible.  Pauly Shore is the weak link really, laughing at his own script and sometimes looking at the camera too.  So in effect the film is rubbish and it shows.  They spent fifteen million dollars making it, planting that in terms of trees would have helped the planet more.  The message of the film overall behind the crass crud is about saving the planet and this made me laugh more than all the planned gags.  If these two losers represent the common man then this globe is truly ‘boned dude and lost buddy’.

Don’t lose brain cells watching this rubbish.  Thanks Jim!

GBS

Charge! or How to Play Wargames – A book from Bob McAlister

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Back before Christmas my good friend Bob McAlister and his family sent myself and my own family a package all the way from their home in America (see this previous post).  I promised not to open it for a few days but what with work and family I kept it until the big day at Christmas and I stuck to this revised promise like a dog to a bone.  Indeed I often passed the box and my hand reached out…but no!  Waited.  When opened there were many goodies in the box for my Good Lady and my wee three too but I will stick to the gift sent to me.  I present to you a short review of Charge! or How to Play Wargames by Brig.P.Young & Lt.Col J.P.Lawford published by Athena Books in 1986.

Vintage wargaming books from before the ‘age of commercialism’ when it was a hobby for gentlemen and the idea of science fiction and fantasy on a table was truly outlandish are a pet love for me and I own quite a few including many of Fetherstone’s titles such as Complete Wargaming (which is better overall than this book but also far more in depth).  I had wanted ‘Charge!’ for a while but copies were expensive so Bob had done me a real favour by getting me a copy far cheaper in its native North America.  Charge! is written as a set of ‘horse and musket’ rules with attached scenario and introduction.  Despite thirty years passing the rules look very solid and I threw some dice and used my Flintloque figures for pieces and they worked well.  A lot like the kind of rules I like to write, flexible, fun, hobby based and no more complex than they need to be.  The book is split into two parts as far as the rules go, the basic game and the advanced game.  This is something lacking in British titles of this period and is something that has come over from the USA in my generation.

Charge! is not a book about Wargaming as such, it is a book of wargame rules that despite what the author says is best suited to wars of the high 18th century and not earlier or later periods.  I enjoyed reading it and will revisit it in the future too.  As far as I know this book is out of print but it can still be had for those who want to seek it out.  If you can get it cheaply, or from a good friend (!) then I recommend you do.  Thanks again Bob.

GBS

The Ironclad Prophecy by Pat Kelleher

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Back in November 2012 I got two books in the post and while I did not think I would get time to post a full review of either of them (and I was right too, time is short due to just now busy 15mm.co.uk is with orders!) I do want to say a little about the one I have just finished which is by Pat Kelleher.  I have pasted in below what I already posted about this book before moving on to an opinion:

Ironclad Prophecy by Pat Kelleher.

This is the second book in what is now three for Pat Kelleher placed in the ‘No Mans World’ setting.  I have the first one and Ironclad Prophecy has been out for a while but I wanted to read them in order so I got this one when I saw an advert for The Alleyman which follows it in the series.  Essentially the plot concerns the infamous 13th Battalion of the Pennine Fusiliers who simply vanished leaving a huge crater while fighting on the western front in WW1.  A mine you suppose…nope, they have been transported to an alien world where all manner of creepies wait for them.  The premise interested me as original and entertaining plus the author puts it across as a true tale by way of ‘letters and accounts’ from the period and a hush up by the British top brass.  Again begin with the first one Blackhand Gang, otherwise it will make no sense!

I enjoyed the book a lot.  It was slow to get going but once it did it was a racing ride of adventure packed with giant sky jellyfish and shoggoth type creatures.   There was no ending in the plot but it set up beautifully for the third book which I will be getting in my next book bundle in March for my birthday.  You can get the book from a lot of places but here is a link to Amazon which provides me with great service and you can read snippet reviews there too.  But from me I will say its a cracking read which if you like dark fantasy and world war one then you will love it.

GBS

BattleShip Movie Review

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From Indian Cinema and why not….

Sorry everyone…I know you want me to keep on creating more wargaming content but I thought I would take a Sunday afternoon to watch a film and put a review of it up here.  I like movies, I like science fiction a lot, so it stands I would like a big budget Hollywood title along those lines.  Plus I own the game its based on and my three sons enjoy playing it.  But….

Ha,Ha,Ha…this is one of the worst films I have ever watched!  It is has one, yes, one plus point.  The CGI special effects are superb, really well done and the only thing worth watching in the movie.  What of the rest of it?

I could say that making a film based on toys is a bad idea but it’s not.  Lots of good and average productions have come from Transformers, GI Joe, Thomas the Tank Engine and so on.  Making a film based on a board game though, aside from Jumanji I cannot think of any (not true, Mousetrap is a great comedy) is a bit more dubious.  Hasbro made it work with Transformers so why not Battleship?  Well here is a list of what I saw and thought based on watching it all the way through.

  • The plot is super thin.  Never mind physics or anything like that.  Talk to the stars so they send an invasion force to Earth to kills us all (an invasion force unable to steer their own ships incidentally).  They lose their ‘comms’ ship and need the messaging system here on Earth to send for extra troops…but they have tech that allows for crossing space REALLY FAST (light years in days) and they MUST have told their mates they were invading another planet!  They don’t need the primitive Human tech at bloody all!
  • The acting is ruddy awful from start to end.  Aside from Liam Neeson who despite changing his accent in every scene makes his dialogue work the rest of  the acting is turgid and at times actually ‘mentally handicapped’ too.  It reminded me of all things a 1980’s kids cartoon.  I will not quote examples but adding swearing would actually have helped.  Rihanna might not mime to her songs but she should have in this film she is not an actress and the real life navy veterans were just made to look foolish.
  • Formulaic at every step.  Painfully so.  The film is a like a path of falling domino’s or a tick list of idiocy.  The central character is a loud mouth looser and criminal (breaking and entering) but he is convinced to join the navy (why?) and is made an officer right away!  All the characters tell him he has skills and such but I never saw any and he never inspires any confidence as a lead.  He gets the girl which makes no sense.  He survives when he should not…and he smart mouths everyone (there is no respect for superiors in this mans navy!).  Best example.  When the alien ship surfaces he heads over to it on a launch and jumps onto it.  ‘Dude its like totally might be alien and shit’.  Rhianna ‘well I think so too duh’.  Then he turns to face his commander and shrugs…real professional.  Then as everyone says ‘bad idea dude, bad idea’ he touches a glyph and lost world style it begins the whole shooting match.   No First Contact trauma for this chump.  Then they make him a Captain!  A captain in a ship of cretins.  No First Contact trauma but at the sight of dead sailors…arrgh…panic!
  • The Aliens.  They looked great and that is it.  They were awesomely dense at all times, unable to use their own weapons and throwing away every advantage they had over Humanity.  With such bad acting, horrid lines and so on you want them to win but they cannot fly their ships or fight at all.   They seem to be psychotic pacifists…work that one out.  Is it flickering RED for kill it or GREEN for don’t kill it or is it RED with GREEN on it like a road bridge but we kill it anyway?
  • The Shield.  Yes, the aliens can generate a shield that forms a several mile high dome over a large area..kind of like a Battleship board game board limiting the pieces in play…  More awful dialogue follows…its not North Korea or some navy secret experiment….pathological avoidance of the bleeding obvious.  It cannot be Human in origin.  Oh the aliens are shooting at us…what do we do…oh no its like Battlestar Galactica none of our advance weapons work anymore…panic.  We had training and procedure for being shot at…what was it dude…I don’t know.   Oh, yeah its personal dude attack them Ok Corral style.  Plus we can confuse them with sunlight!
  • Sugar Coated Boak.   Boak is a Scottish word which means to be violently sick and it suits this movie.  I know Americans like to salute their flag and that is totally fine with me but this film takes it WAY too far.  It takes every heart on sleeve moment possible and wrings the life out of them while screaming ‘USA,USA’ over and over.  I am not American so I can’t say but it must have made people there cringe with embarrassment; it did for me over and over.  You can love your country, your navy, your service personnel without insulting them like Battleship did.  The final scene with the real life veterans was appalling.  If the characters from this film were real it would make me very scared that they had access to a handgun never mind cruise missiles and nuclear weapons too.
  • Putting the Board game in the Film.  Several scenes and events (tracking ocean movements, milk can projectiles etc) are put in for reference to the board game.  Nice touch, but it does not add anything except to confuse the thin plot further.
  • Final loss of Believability.  The USS Missouri is a 70 year old museum piece but that is ok we can take twenty geriatric former sailors and get her sailing again in hours with no prep and one hundredth of the needed crew.  These are real sailors and their dialogue is horrid!  Quick turn the battleship, the aliens cannot traverse their own weapon pods!  It gets worse…they beat the aliens with the ancient ship by dropping anchor and making one hundred thousand tons of steel skid in the water like a bloody touring car on a racetrack!

All in all its a terrible wooden movie which is so bad its actually funny.  It ends with a little scene after the credits which sealed it for me….Scottish Highlands…NO, totally wrong landscape, Scottish Barn…NO unlike any architecture you would see outside of Ohio, Scottish Workman…NO totally wrong kind of Asian van and equipment…if that is Scotland then I am an Admiral.  Sums up Battleship really..treats the audience like mugs.

In saying all this it makes me want to start a regular feature of reviewing bad or poor films that are in this or similar genres.  I get inspiration for wargaming from some strange places so both you lot reading this and me viewing might both learn something or at least have a chuckle in trying.

Seriously…wait for Battleship to be on free view television.  I did and it saved me a few pounds I would have regretted spending.

GBS

Voodoo Orc Undead Todoroni Video

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When you have a spare ten minutes head on over to Youtube or click above and check out Rob Alderman’s video on his Undead Todoroni of the 777th Croaked Line.  The video is a mix of product review and painting example and also character essay.  A good watch.  Rob is getting really good at his videos and it shows.  He is a little hard on himself though when he should not be.  I have had a lot of feedback from regular players of Flintloque and Slaughterloo who love these unique and fun miniatures.

You might remember my short series of postings about this set of miniatures.  If you want a recap and to read them again then go here for the final one and follow the links backwards from there.

Below you can see an image taken from an as yet to be published Flintloque scenario with these miniatures in prime place.  Enjoy!

Cold as Hell but Cooking with Gas!

Cold as Hell but Cooking with Gas!

GBS

Reading with total Abbadon

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Two new titles from the postman!

Sorry for the bad pun title but I could not resist it.  I came home this week to find a wee package waiting for me from Amazon (too lazy or busy to get to the bookshop, you decide which) containing two titles from my ‘wanna read’ list.  I treated myself for the extra hours I had put in on Slaughterloo Redux over the last month and am now faced with the choice of which to read first.  I actually want to read both so I might try and read them at the same time, having done this already with a novel and a history book over a couple of days.  So what are they?

Times Arrow by Jonathan Green.

Times Arrow is the elventh novel in the Pax Brittania series by Abbadon.  Set in an alternate universe it is fantasy fun adventure in a British Empire which steam dominates the globe.  This is the eight book (yes I own all of them) with the hero Ulysses Quicksilver who could quite easily have been a member of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen taking on the hun, the foe, the alien and the monstrous for Queen and Empire.  The plot of this one concerns Paris, murder and a trip to the Moon.  Streampunk adventure of the highest order.  While the plot alone makes me want to read it, as a writer, what also interests me is that this tale was actually penned in three separate parts and published on Kindle before this paperback edition was collected.  I would recommend starting with Unnatural History though as its the first one.

Ironclad Prophecy by Pat Kelleher.

This is the second book in what is now three for Pat Kelleher placed in the ‘No Mans World’ setting.  I have the first one and Ironclad Prophecy has been out for a while but I wanted to read them in order so I got this one when I saw an advert for The Alleyman which follows it in the series.  Essentially the plot concerns the infamous 13th Battalion of the Pennine Fusiliers who simply vanished leaving a huge crater while fighting on the western front in WW1.  A mine you suppose…nope, they have been transported to an alien world where all manner of creepies wait for them.  The premise interested me as original and entertaining plus the author puts it across as a true tale by way of ‘letters and accounts’ from the period and a hush up by the British top brass.  Again begin with the first one Blackhand Gang, otherwise it will make no sense!

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I might not get around to posting reviews of these titles due to time constraints but I should be able to put a micro review in the comments below…perhaps that will work.  Anyhoo…if this catches your interest go out and get reading with total abbadon!

GBS

B.B.King the Life of Riley

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The great B.B.King

Coming out in a few very lucky cinema’s this week is a biopic of the greatest living blues man B.B.King (sorry Mr Guy you are a close second to me).  I will not be able to see this film until it comes out on DVD but for now I am content to watch clips and listen to my collection of his music.  Those who know me know that I am a big fan of the Blues along with vintage Prog-Rock and other music of the 1950’s-1970’s but my love of this music comes from my childhood and, thanks to my father, a visit to B.B’s club in Memphis when I was a young teenager.

The film by GFM Films is titled The Life of Riley being a play on the old phrase plus that is actually Mr King’s first name.  It features interviews and so on along with live footage and a lot of the man himself looking over a life and career that has spanned way more than half a century.  Follow the link in this paragraph to learn more on this and see some stills.

Below I have put a clip from the film which you can enjoy but it makes me a bit sad really that I have never seen him play and likely I never will.

GBS

Napoleon’s Army (H.C.B.Rogers) – Review

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My copy of ‘Napoleons Army’ by H.C.B Rogers published in the early 1970’s but still in print and available widely.

I had another book review planned on a science fiction paperback I just finished but I got passed a note yesterday that one of Alternative Armies customers who is also a member of the Notables Yahoo Group had asked if I knew of a good book about the French Army in the Napoleonic Wars.  Know of one I said…I own a load of them!  Sure I could help.   But which one to choose?  The notable in question had said it must be in English which narrowed the field and that it should have formations and structure of all arms of the army so that narrowed it again.  Lastly that uniforms were to be included in the book.  This took me back to one of my favourites namely ‘Napoleons Army’ by Colonel H.C.B Rogers.

This book has all that is needed.  Divided into sections including a history of the battles of the period the French fought in followed by Infantry, Cavalry, Artillery, Engineers & Signals, Administration, Medical Services, Imperial Headquarters.  Then two accounts of the Third Corps at Auerstadt and in Poland ending with an Epilogue.  Each section has full information on structure, uniforms, weapons, ranks and more.  Importantly each section ends with a list of sources allowing further reading and proving the knowledge of the author.  I doubt anyone except a half mad games writer would need more information (though I own many of the books quoted as sources!) as this book is packed.  My own edition is nearly two hundred pages of easily read text with line drawings.  I have used it many times when creating material for Flintloque.

While my own edition can be had second hand or on ebay etc if you look, there is a current edition which is easily had for less than ten pounds.  Here is the Amazon UK link for it.

If you want a solid title on the French Army under Napoleon then this is the one.

GBS